Guidelines for Relative/NREFM Comfort Calls After Child Separation
Guidelines for initiating comfort calls between relatives/NREFMs and birth parents after child separation, emphasizing the child's safety and well-being. The initial call within 12 hours focuses on the child's needs, setting aside grievances, and establishing new roles. Suggestions on who should initiate the call and how to conduct it with support and boundaries are provided.
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Presentation Transcript
Comfort Calls with Relatives & Non Related Extended Family Members (NREFMs) Initial Phone Call between Relative Caregiver/NREFM and the Birth Parent several hours after separation
What is a Relative/NREFM Comfort Call? Occurs within 12 hours of arrival, setting aside any possible grievances Moving forward, the child will be the FOCUS instead of the preexisting relationship between the relatives Communicating that the beloved child is safe & sound An opportunity to acknowledge that the situation is difficult and that these are new roles for everyone involved; where unfamiliar boundaries will need to be upheld and respected Gives parent an opportunity to share something they think the relative caregiver needs to know in order to respond to the child s immediate needs. Inform parent of about the Parent Caregiver Conversation that will take place in approximately 2 days when they will have a chance to talk more. The first opportunity to begin a new kind of relationship, one that places the child in the center & helps the child to heal, and helps the parent to reunify
WHO should initiate the Comfort Call? As with Comfort Calls involving placement in a Resource Family home with a non- relative, we need options & flexibility without compromising consistency Relative/NREFM Caregiver with Department Representative present (e.g. Emergency Response Social Worker or EFH Coordinator) because there may be pre-existing grievances, or on the contrary, a very close relationship and may need coaching on to name that these roles are very different FFA Worker support when ER SW unavailable If child going to a relative/NREFM from VOMCC or an EFH, maybe EFH parent or VOMCC staff can be on the call for support
THE HOW Google Voice? Personal Phone? SW s work cell? Another App? Zoom? Relative/NREFM Caregiver will say things like: I know this is scary (Child s Name) is our focus now and not our relationship Reunification is the goal and I want you to be successful I will need to treat you differently and exercise boundaries that we may not be used to You will have access to a Parent Mentor for support who has been through this and successfully reunified I will have access to kinship support groups It s important for you to work with the CPS workers We are going to have a Parent Caregiver Conversation with a CPS worker in the next day to two that will be longer. You ll be able to ask more questions at that time Would you like to tell (child s name) that you love them?
TRAINING NEEDS The relative/NREFM will be provided with a simple, easy to follow, handout Additional written material will be provided (e.g. Leela s paperwork ) that will have testimonials & advice from people with experience with caring for a relative s child Timely referral to Lilliput Wayfinder for kinship caregiver support & required trauma training (e.g. social worker to provide the phone number at time of placement)
