Managing Anger When Things Go Wrong
Making
Making
Things Right
Things Right
When Things Go Wrong
When Things Go Wrong
When Things Go Wrong
When Things Go Wrong
•
The importance of attitude.
•
The difference conviction can make.
•
The guidance of goals in our lives.
•
Letting go of the past.
•
Resisting resentment.
When Things Go Wrong
When Things Go Wrong
Be angry, and yet do not sin; do not let the
sun go down on your anger, and do not give
the devil an opportunity.
(Ephesians 4:26-27)
Check Your Anger
Check Your Anger
When Things Go Wrong
When Things Go Wrong
But now you also, put them all aside: anger,
wrath, malice, slander, and abusive speech
from your mouth.
(Colossians 3:8)
Check Your Anger
Check Your Anger
When Things Go Wrong
When Things Go Wrong
This you know, my beloved brethren. But
everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak
and slow to anger; for the anger of man does
not achieve the righteousness of God.
(James 1:19-20)
Check Your Anger
Check Your Anger
When Things Go Wrong
When Things Go Wrong
Cease from anger and forsake wrath; Do not
fret; it leads only to evildoing.
(Psalm 37:8)
Check Your Anger
Check Your Anger
When Things Go Wrong
When Things Go Wrong
A hot-tempered man stirs up strife, But the
slow to anger calms a dispute.
(Proverbs 15:18)
Check Your Anger
Check Your Anger
When Things Go Wrong
When Things Go Wrong
Do not associate with a man given to anger;
Or go with a hot-tempered man.
(Proverbs 22:24)
Check Your Anger
Check Your Anger
When Things Go Wrong
When Things Go Wrong
A fool always loses his temper, But a wise man
holds it back.
(Proverbs 29:11)
Check Your Anger
Check Your Anger
When Things Go Wrong
When Things Go Wrong
Do not be eager in your heart to be angry, For
anger resides in the bosom of fools.
(Ecclesiastes 7:9)
Check Your Anger
Check Your Anger
When Things Go Wrong
When Things Go Wrong
Get a handle on your anger…really?
•
Anger is tough to modify
•
Anger is supercharged
•
Anger is a big stressor
•
Anger prevents problem solving
•
Anger distorts truth
•
Anger is addictive
Check Your Anger
Check Your Anger
When Things Go Wrong
When Things Go Wrong
What causes anger?
Check Your Anger
Check Your Anger
•
Violated rights
•
Unrealistic expectations
•
Fear
•
Anxiety
•
Disappointment
•
Making ourselves angry
•
Blame
•
Injustice
•
Shame
•
Stuck in a bad situation
When Things Go Wrong
When Things Go Wrong
What causes anger? The A B C’s of anger.
A.
Activating Event – external triggers, people doing things
against our wants or goals.
B.
Belief or Bias –
•
Hostile attribution bias assumes the intent of the other person.
•
We might hold a belief of how people should act.
•
We believe it was worse that it really was, exaggeration.
•
Belief that we, “Can’t handle” that behavior or low frustration
tolerance.
C.
Emotional Consequence
Check Your Anger
Check Your Anger
When Things Go Wrong
When Things Go Wrong
Ways to Manage Anger
1.
Vent it
2.
Stuff it
3.
Prevent it
Check Your Anger
Check Your Anger
When Things Go Wrong
When Things Go Wrong
Ways to Manage Anger, Prevent it
Check Your Anger
Check Your Anger
•
Think before you speak
•
Communicate
•
Give yourself a moment
•
Physical activity
•
Identify solutions
•
Stick with “I” statements
•
Don’t hold a grudge
•
Use humor
•
Practice relaxing
•
Problem solving
•
Know when to seek help
When Things Go Wrong
When Things Go Wrong
Ways to Process Anger
1.
Give yourself permission to be angry.
2.
Report feelings of anger.
3.
Do no harm.
4.
Identify/handle trigger points.
5.
Ask someone to help.
Check Your Anger
Check Your Anger
When Things Go Wrong
When Things Go Wrong
Barriers to Anger Control
1.
Ego
2.
Communication
Check Your Anger
Check Your Anger
When Things Go Wrong
When Things Go Wrong
Conflict resolution
(Matthew 5:23; 18:15)
1.
Understand before you are understood.
2.
Give in, acquiesce.
3.
Win/Win
4.
Agree to Disagree
Check Your Anger
Check Your Anger
Explore the importance of attitude, controlling anger, and letting go of resentment when facing challenges. Drawing wisdom from various scriptures, learn how anger can disrupt peace and why it's crucial to maintain composure in difficult situations.
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Presentation Transcript
MakingThings Right When Things Go Wrong
When Things Go Wrong The importance of attitude. The difference conviction can make. The guidance of goals in our lives. Letting go of the past. Resisting resentment.
When Things Go Wrong Check Your Anger Be angry, and yet do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and do not give the devil an opportunity. (Ephesians 4:26-27)
When Things Go Wrong Check Your Anger But now you also, put them all aside: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and abusive speech from your mouth. (Colossians 3:8)
When Things Go Wrong Check Your Anger This you know, my beloved brethren. But everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger; for the anger of man does not achieve the righteousness of God. (James 1:19-20)
When Things Go Wrong Check Your Anger Cease from anger and forsake wrath; Do not fret; it leads only to evildoing. (Psalm 37:8)
When Things Go Wrong Check Your Anger A hot-tempered man stirs up strife, But the slow to anger calms a dispute. (Proverbs 15:18)
When Things Go Wrong Check Your Anger Do not associate with a man given to anger; Or go with a hot-tempered man. (Proverbs 22:24)
When Things Go Wrong Check Your Anger A fool always loses his temper, But a wise man holds it back. (Proverbs 29:11)
When Things Go Wrong Check Your Anger Do not be eager in your heart to be angry, For anger resides in the bosom of fools. (Ecclesiastes 7:9)
When Things Go Wrong Check Your Anger Get a handle on your anger really? Anger is tough to modify Anger is supercharged Anger is a big stressor Anger prevents problem solving Anger distorts truth Anger is addictive
When Things Go Wrong Check Your Anger What causes anger? Violated rights Unrealistic expectations Fear Anxiety Disappointment Making ourselves angry Blame Injustice Shame Stuck in a bad situation
When Things Go Wrong Check Your Anger What causes anger? The A B C s of anger. A. Activating Event external triggers, people doing things against our wants or goals. B. Belief or Bias Hostile attribution bias assumes the intent of the other person. We might hold a belief of how people should act. We believe it was worse that it really was, exaggeration. Belief that we, Can t handle that behavior or low frustration tolerance. C. Emotional Consequence
When Things Go Wrong Check Your Anger Ways to Manage Anger 1. Vent it 2. Stuff it 3. Prevent it
When Things Go Wrong Check Your Anger Ways to Manage Anger, Prevent it Think before you speak Communicate Give yourself a moment Physical activity Identify solutions Stick with I statements Don t hold a grudge Use humor Practice relaxing Problem solving Know when to seek help
When Things Go Wrong Check Your Anger Ways to Process Anger 1. Give yourself permission to be angry. 2. Report feelings of anger. 3. Do no harm. 4. Identify/handle trigger points. 5. Ask someone to help.
When Things Go Wrong Check Your Anger Barriers to Anger Control 1. Ego 2. Communication
When Things Go Wrong Check Your Anger Conflict resolution (Matthew 5:23; 18:15) 1. Understand before you are understood. 2. Give in, acquiesce. 3. Win/Win 4. Agree to Disagree
