Understanding Coercive Control in Relationships

 
Recognising and Responding
to Coercive Control
 
 
1
 
What is coercive control?
 
a course of conduct aimed at
dominating and controlling another
usually an intimate partner, but it may
be present in other family or ‘carer’
relationships
mostly, but not always, perpetrated by
men against women
 
https://dfvbenchbook.aija.org.au/
section  3.2 Coercive control
 
2
 
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.
 
It’s a tricky thing to identify sometimes.  A simple
thing like ‘he wouldn’t let me have the money and I
was stuck’ [might indicate coercive control].  Don’t
just look for the big hitters, the shouters…
Magistrates… need to understand the subtlety of
the abuse.  The physical abuse might have
happened years ago but that has set up the pattern
of domination, now look for the subtle things.  …
[coercive control] can be equally as dangerous as
the big hitters.
(Magistrate)
 
3
 
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Individually behaviours can be easily
explained but together its coercive control.
(Magistrate)
 
 
4
 
W
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k
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?
 
Conduct which belittles and humiliates
Use of animals, including direct threats of
violence to animals or threats to keep animals
from victim/survivors
Limitations on liberty, movement and social
interactions (isolation)
Threats to commit suicide
Rigid rule-making
Vengeful use of authorities
Monitoring, surveillance eg via technology
 
5
 
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n
 
Threats in relation to children are common
aspects of coercive control.
 
For example, the abusive parent may
threaten:
to deprive the victim/survivor of contact
with the children of the relationship
to report her to child protection services
and the victim/survivor will be exposed as
a bad parent
if the victim/survivor tells anyone about the
abuse.
 
6
 
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Coercive control may be used differently in
different communities.
Extended family
Religious pressures
‘Cultural’ expectations
may play a more important role in some
communities than others.
 
7
 
T
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s
h
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p
 
Intimidating the victim/survivor, causing fear
Isolation
Jealousy
Monitoring
Attacks on self-confidence
Loss of autonomy
Economic abuse
Intense affection followed by removal of intense
affection,
Offender justifying abusive behaviour
Illicit drugs/substance use
 
8
 
T
h
e
 
r
e
d
 
f
l
a
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a
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s
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p
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a
t
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The time just before separation and soon after is a
time of heightened risk.
Threats (to kill the victim/survivor of abuse,
children, extended family, pets, suicide or self-
harm)
Strangulation/hands on the throat
Harassing
Monitoring
Disputes about children’s matters
Victim/survivor downplays or normalises abuse
Attempts to control court hearings
 
9
 
T
h
e
 
r
e
d
 
f
l
a
g
s
f
o
r
 
c
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r
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t
r
o
l
a
f
t
e
r
s
e
p
a
r
a
t
i
o
n
.
 
Perpetrators may use the legal system as a tactic of
coercive control.
Sometimes called ‘legal systems abuse’
Perpetrators may:
make multiple applications and complaints in
multiple courts
make cross-applications for protection orders
try to  delay proceedings seeking multiple
adjournments
subpoena the victim/survivor’s family and friends
as witnesses
 delay or refuse to make financial disclosure
seek to have matters heard separately
conflict out lawyers
 
10
 
V
i
c
t
i
m
/
s
u
r
v
i
v
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c
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m
p
l
e
x
.
 
Victim/survivors’ may:
be framed as perpetrators
present with a ‘normalised’ response to abuse
support their abusive partner’s bail application
retract statements
side with their abuser rather than their children
stay in a relationship because of coercive control
 
11
 
How do you
address
coercive control
in the court
room/process?
 
Telling perpetrators who attempt to blame the
victim/survivor that the consequences of their
behaviour is no one’s fault but their own.
Where there is coercive control, refuse to
entertain submissions of defence counsel in pleas
in mitigation that a family violence perpetrator
has ‘an anger management problem’ or ‘lost their
temper.’
Call out descriptions of abusive relationships as
‘toxic’, ‘volatile’ relationships.
Be aware that apparently ‘trivial’ breaches may
indicate high risk.
Call out attempts to exert inappropriate
behaviour in the court environment.
 
12
 
How do you
address
coercive control
in the court
room/process?
 
Be mindful of the effects of trauma on giving
evidence.
Be mindful of physical aspects of court surrounds
which can improve safety for those participating in
court processes.
Call on security to reduce risk of breaches and other
inappropriate behaviour in waiting areas.
Take care not to collude with people who you find are
abusive.
Tailor protection orders to address particular coercive
and controlling elements of individual relationships.
Encourage parties to seek (independent) legal advice.
Consider asking a suspected victim/survivor if they
can decide now or whether they need more time (re:
consent orders).
 
13
 
More information:
 
See the 
National Domestic and Family Violence Bench Book
https://dfvbenchbook.aija.org.au/
Especially: section  3.2 Coercive control
 
14
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Coercive control is a pattern of behavior used to dominate and control an individual, often seen in intimate partner relationships but can occur in other family dynamics. It is crucial to recognize the subtle signs of coercive control, such as financial restrictions, isolation, threats, and monitoring. Behaviors like belittling, threatening suicide, or using children to manipulate are common indicators. Awareness of cultural differences is vital in identifying and responding to coercive control effectively.


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  1. Recognising and Responding to Coercive Control 1

  2. What is coercive control? a course of conduct aimed at dominating and controlling another usually an intimate partner, but it may be present in other family or carer relationships mostly, but not always, perpetrated by men against women https://dfvbenchbook.aija.org.au/ section 3.2 Coercive control 2

  3. Its a tricky thing to identify sometimes. A simple thing like he wouldn t let me have the money and I was stuck [might indicate coercive control]. Don t just look for the big hitters, the shouters Magistrates need to understand the subtlety of the abuse. The physical abuse might have happened years ago but that has set up the pattern of domination, now look for the subtle things. [coercive control] can be equally as dangerous as the big hitters. Coercive control is often subtle subtle. (Magistrate) 3

  4. Coercive control look for patterns patterns of behaviour Individually behaviours can be easily explained but together its coercive control. (Magistrate) 4

  5. What kinds of kinds of behaviours behaviours might indicate coercive control? Conduct which belittles and humiliates Use of animals, including direct threats of violence to animals or threats to keep animals from victim/survivors Limitations on liberty, movement and social interactions (isolation) Threats to commit suicide Rigid rule-making Vengeful use of authorities Monitoring, surveillance eg via technology 5

  6. Threats in relation to children are common aspects of coercive control. For example, the abusive parent may threaten: to deprive the victim/survivor of contact with the children of the relationship to report her to child protection services and the victim/survivor will be exposed as a bad parent if the victim/survivor tells anyone about the abuse. Coercive control and children children 6

  7. Coercive control cultural cultural differences differences Coercive control may be used differently in different communities. Extended family Religious pressures Cultural expectations may play a more important role in some communities than others. 7

  8. Intimidating the victim/survivor, causing fear Isolation Jealousy Monitoring Attacks on self-confidence Loss of autonomy Economic abuse Intense affection followed by removal of intense affection, Offender justifying abusive behaviour Illicit drugs/substance use The red flags red flags for coercive control during during the relationship relationship 8

  9. The time just before separation and soon after is a time of heightened risk. Threats (to kill the victim/survivor of abuse, children, extended family, pets, suicide or self- harm) Strangulation/hands on the throat Harassing Monitoring Disputes about children s matters Victim/survivor downplays or normalises abuse Attempts to control court hearings The red flags red flags for coercive control after after separation separation 9

  10. Perpetrators may use the legal system as a tactic of coercive control. Sometimes called legal systems abuse Perpetrators may: make multiple applications and complaints in multiple courts make cross-applications for protection orders try to delay proceedings seeking multiple adjournments subpoena the victim/survivor s family and friends as witnesses delay or refuse to make financial disclosure seek to have matters heard separately conflict out lawyers The red flags red flags for coercive control after after separation separation. 10

  11. Victim/survivors may: be framed as perpetrators present with a normalised response to abuse support their abusive partner s bail application retract statements side with their abuser rather than their children stay in a relationship because of coercive control Victim/survivors Victim/survivors responses responses to coercive control are complex. 11

  12. Telling perpetrators who attempt to blame the victim/survivor that the consequences of their behaviour is no one s fault but their own. Where there is coercive control, refuse to entertain submissions of defence counsel in pleas in mitigation that a family violence perpetrator has an anger management problem or lost their temper. Call out descriptions of abusive relationships as toxic , volatile relationships. Be aware that apparently trivial breaches may indicate high risk. Call out attempts to exert inappropriate behaviour in the court environment. How do you address coercive control in the court room/process? 12

  13. Be mindful of the effects of trauma on giving evidence. Be mindful of physical aspects of court surrounds which can improve safety for those participating in court processes. Call on security to reduce risk of breaches and other inappropriate behaviour in waiting areas. Take care not to collude with people who you find are abusive. Tailor protection orders to address particular coercive and controlling elements of individual relationships. Encourage parties to seek (independent) legal advice. Consider asking a suspected victim/survivor if they can decide now or whether they need more time (re: consent orders). How do you address coercive control in the court room/process? 13

  14. More information: See the National Domestic and Family Violence Bench Book https://dfvbenchbook.aija.org.au/ Especially: section 3.2 Coercive control 14

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